Human Hearts

Feelings.......Sometimes they're insufferable. They infiltrate your mind, twist your sanity, and throw your focus off balance from completing certain tasks at hand. They make you insufficient, turn you into an incompetent fool.

At this very moment, I am that fool.

One guy. Just one guy, and the very thought, the very sight of him has managed to turn my world upside down. This is completely insane! Why is this happening to me??

I can't envision being in a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship with him or marrying him. It's funny, that's not the way I'm feeling at all. You would have thought that anyone with a crush would be thinking about going steady and eventual marriage. But somehow I can't envision that with him. It seems like it's more of a physical attraction.....I want him. I want him to be my first kiss, I want him to be my first......Well, everything...except love. Perhaps it's because I don't know him well enough. If I get a chance to know him better, perhaps I might be desiring a more platonic relationship with him.....

Feelings have taken over my sanity. I am no longer in command of my life. I am lost in a boiling cauldron of intense emotions - yearning, desire, confusion, emptiness.